I hoped things would settle. They have, in a way.
I wished I would learn to deal. I have, sort of.
I dreamed of a time when I would feel like I have a handle on things. Well...there, I was most certainly dreaming!
Four months later, I'm....
.... in the midst of planning a wedding because my daughter's budding relationship did not crash and burn.
.... learning the requirements of a new job, since the economic realities of 2010 defunded my old one. .... designing a harp costume for a children's theater production of Jack and the Giant.
.... still trying to make phone calls and keep up with the lives and needs of the women at church.
.... mourning the loss of a charming, loving friend--my mother-in-law.
.... wishing I'd trained my children better so
that my house would occasionally be visitor-ready without me rushing around cleaning like a maniac for 24 hours. .... expressing gratitude for a wonderful husband, who loves me despite my many (and rather annoying) flaws.
.... wondering why I keep thinking life will ever be less exhausting, frustrating, overwhelming and challenging than it is.
Bottom line....I chose this. Every bit of it. I may not have been able to see the big picture or all the consequences when I started out. But when given the choice for easy, I opted out.
So with all the wonderful things of my life--children, husband, gospel--comes also the challenges, the stresses and the disappointments.
And, on the big scale I use to weigh things, everything considered, I believe I'm doing well.
No comments:
Post a Comment